He turned his head upward again, hoping to see something, some glimpse of light, anything that would help him. But as before, all that he saw was an utter and unending blackness.
He shivered as the wind rushed past, chilling him. Miserably he dug his hands tighter into the loose ground, fingers wrapping around loose tufts of grass and the roots of trees somewhere above. Once again he tried to push himself upward, but as before the dirt gave away beneath his feet, breaking loose and tumbling down the slope to goodness only knew where. He found the rather large rock that his feet had been resting on and shifted his weight back to it, then closed his eyes and let his head rest against the ground.
It had seemed like such a good idea at the time. Or at least, not a dangerous idea. He had known her for as long as he could remember, or at least as far back as mattered. They had grown to know each other very well over time. He had cared deeply for her, and she for him in kind.
The best night they had spent together had been by the side of the lake. They had walked down the long trail under the cover of night, beneath the full moon, just the two of them, and they had stretched out on the mossy ground, and stared at the sky. And they had talked for hours, about themselves, their past, their present, their ambitions and hopes, their beliefs and opinions, and anything else that occurred to them to talk about. They had talked until dawn, never running out of things to say. That night, growing to understand one another, figuring out what made each other do the things they did, why they were the way they were, had been perhaps the brightest point of their lives.
But that was over. She had died not long ago, senselessly, pointlessly. Her death had left a gaping hole in his heart. Time passed yet he didn't heal, and he had slowly come to realize that he had to return to the lakeside one last time. It was the only place where he would be able to say goodbye.
So he had gone out, at night, to the lake. It was cloudy, unlike the time he had been here with her, and a cold wind blew across the hillside. He had gone to the spot that he knew so well and stared at the moss for a long while, caught in memories of the past. After some time, he had moved over to the edge of the lakeside and placed a small paper boat he had brought with him on the ground. Very carefully he lit a candle and set it on the boat. Then he had gently placed the boat on the water and pushed it away.
And then he sat down on the spot he had stretched out on back at a time that seemed eons past, and he watched the flickering light as it drifted across the lake's surface, pushed by the water currents and wind, until the water finally soaked into the paper enough that it couldn't support the candle anymore, and all at once the light was extinguished as boat and candle dropped into the water. He watched the spot where he had last seen the light for a long time, and he cried for some time--hours or minutes, he didn't know.
Eventually he became aware that it was far colder than before. He looked back up the slope and realized that he could barely make out the trees that were right behind him. Heavy clouds had rolled in, and the crescent moon, which had been near the horizon to begin with, was gone without a trace. It was time for him to go.
He had started back up the trail, lost in his thoughts, feeling tired, weak, and vulnerable. He had brushed past a few trees and was a bit concerned about whether or not he was still on the trail when he took a step and found no ground to place his foot on. Desperately he had reached back, hoping that something, anything, would be there, but his hands found nothing, and he had fallen. Down the steep slope he went, dirt and grass tumbling around him. With an effort he wouldn't have thought he had in him, he'd dug his hands and feet into the ground and slowed his descent enough that when his feet hit a large rock in the hillside he'd been able to steady himself.
So there he was, covered in dirt, on a loose rocky hillside, with no way up or down, in total black. He didn't even know how far up or down the slope extended. All he knew was that he had no idea what to do. He had never felt so helpless.
As the wind gusted yet again, he took another deep breath, shivered involuntarily, and tried to figure out what time it was. It had been night for what seemed like forever. The sun would be up eventually. He hoped he could hang on until then.